I GOT AN EMAIL yesterday from a serviceman who was getting out in a year, and was trying to make decisions for his future. His friends and family wanted him to go to college and plan for his future, but his heart was telling him to buy a van and go live wild and free. He was writing me for my thoughts on what he should do. My answer follows.
Hi, first, thank you for your service for the country!! I think that is one of the hardest questions for any of us to figure out. I married young and had kids so all my dreams were put on hold while I got a job and took care of my family. Thirty years later I have a nice pension and social security will kick in in a few years. So my youth was no fun, but now my older years are wonderful.
That is the typical way we do it the USA, but is it the right way? I think every person has to answer that for themselves. You will be giving up security in your older years for a full, wonderful life now. That sounds pretty good right now, but you might think differently when you are older and eating dog food.
It doesn’t have to be one or the other. After you get out of the service there is nothing wrong with buying a van and traveling in it for a few months or a year. It is so common there is a name for it. It is called a “Gap Year” because there is a gap on your resume between high school and college, or college and starting a career. Your gap will be between leaving the military and staring your schooling or career. I think you have nothing to lose and everything to gain by doing that. After a while you can reevaluate what you want to do with your life. Then you can take another Gap Year or jump on the traditional path. Who knows, in your travels you may come across the perfect place, person or job that will make it clear to you just what you should do with your life.
Maybe a Gap Year will become a Gap Decade and then a Gap Life!
Or maybe with a little luck you will find the perfect gal and have kids and live a “normal” life. There’s nothing wrong with that! I assume your GI benefits are good anytime and you can go to school later in life, right? But you will always have the memories of those months/years of living free.
The one thing I believe in is thinking outside the box. You don’t have to do everything just like everybody else. You can mix and match the elements of your life to your choosing. Life doesn’t have to be black or white. You can travel in a van for awhile. Then go to college and live in a van on campus. Then get a job and build toward a retirement and keep living in a van. Or get married and raise your kids on the road. Think outside the box.
The one thing you should always keep in mind is to be happy. So few of us ever consider whether what we do makes us happy. I believe with all my heart the reason God put us here on earth is not to be “good” but to be happy and at the same time to contribute to the greatest degree possible to the happiness of others.
I wish you the very best! If there is anything I can do to help you follow your dreams, don’t hesitate to ask! – Bob
Do we have to sacrifice the present for the future?
Is it possible to have both a happy youth and happy old age?
I meet more and more young people who are making the choice to be vandwellers and abandon the “normal” American life. While I admire their courage, part of me is old-fashioned enough to worry about their future. Of course everyone must make that decision for themselves, but I strongly encourage you to think it through and realize your present decisions can have powerful consequences in your future. There are no wrong decisions as long as they are fully informed and you think through the full range of possible consequences.
My father’s death had a powerful effect on me. He worked like a dog all of his life and was never very happy. He got all the happiness he could out of life, but in my opinion it wasn’t much. When he turned 60 he retired and never had to think about money again, he was totally financially secure. He was soon diagnosed with cancer and was dead by 62.
I saw that and knew that was NOT what I wanted for my life. I took early retirement at 51 and have never regretted it in any way. The last 6 years have mostly been wonderful beyond my ability to describe them.
At the same time I know people who gave no thought to their future and now in their old age they are paupers, forced to work at jobs they hate just to have enough to eat. That is equally NOT what I want for my life.
As with most things in life, the best choice is generally the middle way. Here are my recommendations to everyone:
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- Insist on being happy now. Living an unhappy life year-after-year, decade-after-decade so you can be happy for a few years in your old age is a horrible way to live. If you aren’t happy now, make changes until you are. Sacrifices will have to be made, but not too much.
- Keep the future in mind. Whether we like it or not we are all going to get old and get sick. Do everything you can to prepare for it.
- Learn to live very cheaply in a van. Needing the minimum amount of money will pay off whether you are young or old.
- Create a community of people around you that support you, and you support them. Being a vandweller has brought me an amazing number of deep, lasting friendships. Nothing is more important for living a happy life.
I lived the traditional lifestyle for decades and felt there was a better way. In my late sixties rebellion struck. Ditching tradition and shocking many has been the happiest time in my life.
Bob, you are a wonderful human being. I admire the way you “Give” so much of yourself. You are making the world a better place with every person who hears you, or reads your words and philosophy. You have had a positive effect on thousands of people. It is a good contagion that you are spreading.
Virtual Hugs,
Linda Shirley
Great thoughts Bob, I tried the conventional life for a few years and didn’t enjoy it but didn’t take up vanlife and continued to work a full time (+) job. I did have adventures that conventional life probably wouldn’t have allowed for, riding a motorcycle to the southernmost point of South America for instance, but I when I retired at 48 I bought a small house in a rural area surrounded by mountains, forests, lakes etc. I’m now 66 and in the last few years have discovered “5th wheel life”. I have spent several months each year in the fiver and constantly think of going full time, but pushing over that edge seems very difficult. I couldn’t do vanlife, I need more indoor space. I think about where I would be right now if I didn’t have the house, and it’s often ‘right here’ but the flexibility of choosing from week to week is very attractive (and of course I know all the best places ‘right here’).
I think your advice is spot on, a gap year (or two) is definitely the way to go. I would also emphasize that doing that is not a firm life decision, a change of mind is fine any time. Stick with it for a year though, the transition from a structured military life to a free form roaming life might be quite a shock after the initial novelty wears off, which it will.
Your approach is what I recommend, first and foremost. There are those forced into Van-way because of rent expense, cost of living, etc. but too many ‘jump the gun’ invest in fancy rigs without thinking through the entire process. Your solution of rural small house is fabulous; and I might add, it could be done in urban areas too. The key is small, whereas Big only leads to bigger insurance, bigger maintenance, bigger headaches. One added comment: Live where there is moisture enabling gardening, egg laying chickens, etc. Unfortunately, AZ NM TX are not the best for ‘moisture’ and ‘growing food.’ Thanks again for your post, it is one that I have been waiting to see alongside Bob Wells’ movement.
Volkswagen will be introducing their 100 percent electric Minibus in the USA in 2023. Will we have a repeat of the 1960s with the retired Baby Boomers?
I’m curious about electric vehicles as part of a “nomad” lifestyle… How do you recharge while boondocking? When you run out of energy you can’t walk to a fuel station and carry back a gallon of electricity… Hookups at campgrounds can’t plug into your vehicle… So many unanswered questions…
Spot on advice.Never know what life will bring. When young I didn’t realize social security would be so important. My dream of saving lots of money didn’t pan out. Economy has ruined lots of folks. Thank goodness for the opportunities to work on the road today. Love your articles and videos Bob- you have done so much for so many people.
We’d been married five years with one child when my husband decided it was finally time to go to college using his GI benefits. For eight years he worked full time and went to school half time. It was hard. But, along the way he stumbled across a career that never felt like work to him. If you actually enjoy going to work every day you CAN have it all. Yes, our camping was only one weekend a month and 2-3 weeks a year for those years but it made it possible for us to go RVing full time in a really nice rig at age 60. We are now 75 and glad to have Social Security and savings from all those years of working but we are just as glad to have done all that traveling.
Absolutely, take a gap year or two or more.
This is the time to do it, when you are unencumbered by debt and responsibilities to anyone but yourself.
Pursuing this dream will feed your soul.
Thank you for your service, and all the best to you.
Thank you for always sharing your honest opinions and wisdom freely. I think you offered the best possible advice. Hindsight once you are old, is not just 20-20, it can also be very sad.
When I was young, I loved what I did as a career, job, & life, but did not prepare for the years when you are old’er. We all need to prepare for the different decades of life. Balance is the key to having a content life each day.
Wise advice.
Tho’ I prefer “frugally” over “cheaply” as “cheaply” for me implies buying on low price and not on best quality for price.
I did something a little different and never regretted it. When I got out of university I decided to become a scuba instructor. It was truly a burning desire. My family was aghast that I would “throw away”my degree. But it was something I really wanted to do and I knew that if I didn’t do it while I was young, I would always regret it and I would try to do it when I was older. Two reasons why I thought that was a bad idea, first it’s really a tough job on an older body, second, the thought of abandoning a career in middle age to become a scuba instructor sounded like it would cause a financial disaster. Instead, doing it right after University before starting my career seem to be the smart thing to do, physically and financially.
As it turned out I was absolutely right! I ended up following my dream, I taught scuba for about 7 years, and then decided that since I was in my early 30s it was time to start a career. As it turned out, prospective employers found it fascinating that I had taken that time to do something so unusual. A decade later I started working for a county government. Promotions came easy to me, as interviewers thought that I was somebody who dared to do things that were different, somebody who wasn’t afraid to take risks, and somebody who would probably be an excellent manager because of this.
Because I started my career a little later in life, I realized that I would have to save a lot harder than those who had started a profession right out of university. I learned how to live frugally, and I was actually able to retire at the age of 55. Everyone told me that I couldn’t afford to. I told them that I couldn’t afford not to.
I actually spent the first few years of retirement living in different places and working temp jobs. I first went to the Caribbean, later Hawaii, and then I realized I really wanted to try rving so I moved back to the mainland.
I’ve been a full-time RVer now for over 7 years, and while I choose to live in an RV rather than a van, I have been following Bob’s principles for years.
My retirement checks are small because I retired early and only worked for that employer for 17 years. So during that time I have frequently taken temp jobs or work camping jobs for extra money. Because of this I was able to put off taking social security until I was 66 and 2 months, and now I find myself financially secure. Not wealthy or close to it, but I will never have to worry about being homeless or hungry. (Home is an RV and I don’t consider myself to be homeless.)
A major reason that I am very happy that I retired at 55 is that 11 days before I turned 65 I was diagnosed with cancer. After treatments I am now declared to be in remission, but I can’t imagine how awful it would have been to retire directly into cancer treatments. Instead I had a decade of adventurous living to look back on as I endured the year of treatments.
This is a very long way of saying that taking gap time doesn’t necessarily harm anyone’s career and doesn’t necessarily harm their financial future. In fact, whenever I encounter younger people I tell them my story.
I would tell the serviceman that if he didn’t take a little time for himself, especially after he gave his all to serve our country, that he would always regret it. Life should be lived with no regrets. He’s got his whole future ahead of him to get his education and start a family. Another thing is that if he doesn’t do this now, he may get itchy and want to do it in middle age and totally disrupt his family and his career. The time is now.
I have a saying about taking early retirement: “it hasn’t always been easy, but it has always been worth it.”
After 2 years of college I quit to figure out what I wanted to study. I hitched around the country in the 70s – remember the good old days when that was possible? Now we live in a land filled with FEAR where I imagine few would pick up a hitcher.
We are being economically squeezed into dependence / submission to the state: with medical marshall law, bio-warfare by globalists who want to depopulate the planet, unlawful lockdowns under color of law, forced “vaccinations” that alter your very body temple, fuel prices intentionally raised purportedly to “punish” Russia but actually to keep us from exercising our God-given right to travel. It’s all a century-old (and longer) plan to keep you a slave on the plantation. See http://issuesoutline.org/#economy and http://issuesoutline.org/#covid19fraud
“When The People fear government, there is tyranny. When the government fears The People, there is Liberty.” Thomas Jefferson
Beware of our corrupt court system that destroyed my family and 10s of 1000s of others, causing this veteran to spend my best years battling against domestic enemies within our borders: jail for civil disobedience to unlawful extortion orders (falsely called child support), bankruptcy, suspended license, living on the edge of poverty, so I never could by a home. At 68, I’m now trying to pay off my camper van so I’ll have at least a home on wheels. See https://exiledparents.org
By all means, exercise your freedom while you still can young brother/sister. Learn to live a more frugal, simple life, migrate like the birds as seasons change. FREEDOM: use it, or lose it.
My most recent song is about dealing with fear:
Let the Spirit – listen or download free
https://soundcloud.com/markyoungguitar/let-the-spirit
https://markyoungguitar.com/music/let_the_spirit.mp3
I’m confused by your one comment: “jail for civil disobedience to unlawful extortion orders (falsely called child support)”… Are you saying that paying child support for your children is unlawful extorsion? Who should be supporting your children? Please clafify!
(Sorry for typos – I neglected to proof-read before submitting)
When you are already supporting your children and they are stolen unlawfully by a judge without any showing of harm to a child, which is the only lawful basis for denying equal parenthood, then being ordered to pay, that is extortion. It’s Orwellian double speak. It presumes you were a dead-beat parent who had to be ordered to pay. It can only properly be called child support for a parent who had to be ordered to pay. See https://exiledparents.org/
Correction: It can only properly be called child support for a parent who had to be ordered to pay, or who agreed to unequal parenthood.
I grew up in the south and at a time when women were only meant to be housewives, luckily I was adopted into an unconventional family with a tourist court. I tried conventional with husband #1 and #3 and then realized I could do anything I set my heart on, I’ve lived in 5 different states, owned 17 RVs, and work traveled around the USA, and still managed to raise a smart, kind and talented daurghter. overall five husbands and 48 states, I will not make it to Hawaii but Idaho is still on my list.
Patti, ‘ overall five husbands’… O M G !! ? ???
My regards: Lucy.
I love your advice except for ” God put us here on earth not to be good.” Whatever you mean by good but that is one of the reason God put us here on earth is to be good, righteous, happy…etc and Holy so we can be like Him and live with Him after this life. I’m sure you believe in the next life or why are we here on this earth? I hope you don’t believe that we just evolve from parasite. God created man in His image our first parent from the matter in the universe even the earth. God spirit children then merge into this bodies of the first parent and their children and so on and so on.
Thanks Bob. I’ve been following you for 10 years and now my journey is about to be underway. I recently purchased a 1987 Plymouth Voyager with 79k orig miles from the 2nd owner and am just about finished with my minimalist build out. I just turned 70 in Feb.. Woo Hoo! And now my “life” begins.
Thank you so much Bob for the inspiration and courage to live your dream so we can follow your example to live ours.
At age 35 I left a well established career and went car-camping full time for six months, then got part-time jobs here and there to keep me going for another 18 months until I felt ready to go back to my original career. Now as a senior I have a van, live a comfortable life, and go traveling whenever I feel like it for as long as I want. That gap changed me from being a workaholic into someone aware of the need to smell the roses along the way. Work is good and necessary for a lot of reasons and a gap is something good whenever it feels like it will serve you best to keep a balance to your life.
Hi Bob – Darn good words to the young serviceman and the words to all of us. Very well said!
I met you today at Safeway and that was a treat. Travel well!
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on taking a gap year – or more – with the young man recently returning from his time in service. I don’t want to end on a sober note, so I’ll say this right up front: my dad passed away when he was 62, one year after retiring from his teaching career. The time in this lifetime for adventure will not always be there.
You made some great points about security and age. These points are what stand out in Jessica Bruder’s Nomandland, and I can relate – the moves we make can seem like a crap shoot sometimes. A couple of years ago, as I was looking to make a change in my career, the pandemic shut many systems down so that changing jobs and buying a house again become challenging. I ended up selling my short-term condo from an urban living experiment, making enough in equity to purchase a new Airstream and tow vehicle, and I hit the road, making my job at that time remote, even though it was never intended to be. So we can be creative when it comes to making a living, even going to school – I had a daughter in her final year of college at the time, who was safely quarantining with her classmates in an apartment in Boston. After a year of camper living, I had to return to settled life in Maine, which proved to be fruitful: I wrote a book about the experience and am moving toward the publication journey, and I was offered a job that I hoped to settle into one day, a policy position at a research institute with the public university (great retirement benefits!). The housing market is not a buyer’s market for now, so I’m going to hold off, and am still sitting on my original investment from what I put into that condo several years ago after selling a suburban house. (The Airstream was just the equity beyond what I had invested, and I got a good deal on a floor model, so I’m flush!)
Perhaps it’s my age, but I wonder if the settled life and all that comes with it are still normative for young people as they were for us. When I hear you speak about your youth as being “no fun” I feel like I could say the same, although it’s an unfortunate reflection on living a life like the majority of the population does. I had my first daughter young and when I was single, and I put a lot on hold or just ended up juggling more than would have been required if I was free of responsibility. In reality, I don’t know what I put ‘on hold’ as I had no thoughts about what I would do, no plan to be a part of making a difference. But was my life with kids and a house and working the jobs I’ve worked, meeting the people I have as friends today ‘no fun’? I was directionless and had no thought for the future, and bringing the grounding of having a child into my life made me who I am today. Responsibility – for self, for others, for the planet – is something that we can’t avoid if we truly want to be free, and finding focus and passion comes through taking it somewhat seriously. What I can say for sure is that I know myself better now having spent that time on the road with only myself to rely on, taking responsibility for everything I needed. Follow your passion and responsibility won’t feel so un-fun.
Stay settled or move on. That is the question for me now, although I can’t pass up these retirement benefits, and I still have the Airstream – am actually living in it for a bit now. Weekend and vacation camping are nothing like the adventure of being on the move, discovering new people and places around every turn, but abundant time off is another benefit of working for a public university, so I have at least that for now. I’m not wishing for this unrelenting pandemic to continue, but I do hope that some of the new ways of life that we discovered will become normative, like remote work opportunities for a broader segment of the population, allowing for greater living all around. We at the university are slow to return to the office, although it’s expected by now. There may be more opportunity here for me in the future to just disappear as I did before, adjusting to the time changes as I make my way west. Until then, I do plan to move into a house again – a former neighbor has offered me the first floor in a beautiful house a short walk through a Frederick Law Olmsted Park to the university – and can plan for being on the road again one day. I have the retirement home ready to roll.
I think this might be the most important paragraph you’ve ever written, Bob, and it bears repeating:
“The one thing you should always keep in mind is to be happy. So few of us ever consider whether what we do makes us happy. I believe with all my heart the reason God put us here on earth is not to be ‘good’ but to be happy and at the same time to contribute to the greatest degree possible to the happiness of others.”
I have tried to keep both things in mind throughout my life. Even though there have been ups and downs, in general, I’ve had a happy life and have tried my best to help others be happy too. I am in my 60s now, and have very few regrets. Probably the biggest one would be sticking with the “regular” work world too long. My parents were like yours, Bob–they worked hard their whole lives, waiting for retirement, then died before getting there. I felt like I owed it to them not to do the same.
Once I finally got off the treadmill and reduced my need for “stuff”, my life became exponentially better in terms of happiness and my ability to help others. I even started and ran a small non-profit to help low-income families fix, feed, and get vet care for their pets–absolutely the most rewarding (and lowest paying) job I’ve ever done.
I’m retired now, and am thoroughly enjoying it. The non-profit is in new hands, and my experience of living on so little has prepared me perfectly for living in my travel trailer on my Social Security check. Some may think that’s living in poverty, but to me, it’s living in freedom–freedom from lots of bills, freedom from many worries, and freedom from having to spend my life hours doing something I hate. Now I can spend my hours doing what I love, whether it’s walking in a park with my dog, taking photos of the beautiful creatures that live around me, chatting with friends, or expanding my mental horizons with fascinating videos on YouTube.
I think it’s fantastic that more and more young people are realizing that happiness is more valuable than money and stuff. Everyone has to decide what happiness means for them, but my only advice is to make that a top priority as early as possible, then go for it!
Just yesterday I read a story about Grant Sabatier. I don’t remember where it was, but there is an outfit called “Freethink” that has a story on him from March of this year. Looks like it covers the same ground. From that: “Sabatier now belongs to a new generation of Americans who are viewing retirement as ‘an enduring lifestyle,’ moving away from the 9-5 grind.” Might be worth a look.
His book is titled “Financial freedom: A proven path to all the money you will ever need”. Website is “grantsabatier[dot]com” if anyone is interested. The web has more coverage of him as well.
I quit my last job after deciding that I’d rather die than keep working there. OK so far – haven’t worked since July 5, 2005. Am in Cuenca, Ecuador now, but staying tuned in the the van life possibility just in case.
Thank you to the young service man for protecting all of asses while we lived our lives. I would suggest the Vet fixes up a car or van and travels. On VA he can get paid to go to school. Live in your car/camper, attend classes at any community college you like, Say one up north in the summer and one in the south in the winter. As you continue to live in your vehicle keep up with school and work part time to build up cash for food and social security. Live the cheap life and save all you can. Not hard to do. Have fun and meet tons of college girls. Good luck. Thank you Bob for all your good works. Your Pal, Bangkok John.